In Memmorium of my Best Friend…….
It was one of those pale, cold, breezy evenings in December last when I walked past the large gates of my college. After 10 long painful years……!! After 10 dark years of Solitude….. I am now back at my college which once was Heaven on Earth . Withered Leaves on the road started dancing in the gentle breeze that was there. The air was cool. The Breeze …. gently hit my face …it had such a soothing effect which made me feel light at heart. The same old road ….that has tall Asoka and pine trees all along ……all led to my college…. My Alma Mater. There was the welcoming Board in front of me at the gates which said……
“ 9TH RICHARD GONZALVAZ MEMORIAL AWARD DISTRIBUTION & ALUMNI MEET”
My foot showed laziness to move. I thought …. Today is 21st December. It has been exactly 10 years since Richard has left this world. 10 years of loneliness … since my Richy had left me alone. 10 years back … this was the bloody damn date when he died on my Lap.
Further ahead there was a small turning to right which was so familiar to me …. The ‘right ‘ which Richy and I had took hundreds of times together… walking…. Staggering….riding ….and so on… The sign board said ….’Hostel Block B’. I could hear applauds from the auditorium which was near by and which lay straight ahead. Those sounds meant that the function has already got underway. But I preferred to take right. To go to the room where Richy and I had spent the best 4 years of our lives.Our B-Tech College life. The warden recognized me immediately. Our Old George Bhai.
“Hey Syam .. how are u?, The function has already started . what are u doing here ?”
Asked George Bhai.
I said: “ I know …. Just wanted to see B111… Our old room… just for once….Any one up there?”
“No one there now….here are the keys ….. But …. Why son? Are you both going to conspire again how to fool me and pull yourself out for the second show “?
To this I had only a forced smile and turned my foot towards B111. The corridors seemed very much the same. This was the same corridor where I had to drag Richy to our room after we guys held Booze Parties on the terrace of Hostel B on clear blue nights… stars staring back at us. His vomit splattered on my shirts umpteen number of times.
I unlocked B111. The very same room … Nothing has changed…..except for few coats of paints on the ceilings and walls. Our own very aboard…where we spent night out study sessions before exams…. The place where we discussed girls on powerless rainy nights….The place where Richy’s brave expeditions took shape…. I could feel his 555’s puff smudging the air even now….Richy was my room mate…. No… my friend …. No My brother…. No …. My soul Itself…!!!
Time ran back ….like in a dream…!!!
I still remember the day when we checked in as complete strangers.
Richard Gonzalvaz from Goa (B-Tech, Mechanical Engineering). Aka Richy.
Syam Mohan Varma from Cochin , Kerala(B-Tech, Mechanical Engineering).Aka Sam.
Room number B111.
I started knowing Richy as a very outdoorsy person, a guy who had no inhibition in spitting out what ever he had in his mind…A bold, stern, adventurous handsome dude. He was fair, tall, and had bluish green eyes.
His idea of life was to enjoy to maximum whatever it takes to be. Without any responsibilities… without knowing what “worries” were. He found madness in bikes, speed, sports, rum and money. There was nothing romantic in the guy’s life. At a later point of time, I learned the reason for that. Richy was orphaned at a tender age. His parents died in an accident when Richy was a Kid leaving him as a very Rich Orphan. Richy grew up as the commander of his own life. No one to question him. He once told me that he started smoking once he was in his 9th grade. He always used to say “Richy…. The Champ…”. He was stubborn. Never held his head low. But He was good at heart.He was an atheist. A guy who took life as a play where nothing but entertainment mattered.
I also hated Richy for his weird Ideas like cracking fireworks in seniors’ room… revenge for ragging. When caught, Richy took up the responsibility and freed me out of the punishment which he bore alone ….one month suspension. Also he had Wildest of dreams like trekking on Rodingarph’s cliff where no one ever returned after trekking. The guy also knew loathsome tricks like inhaling smoke and blurting it out through his eyes. But The positive art the man knew was his tennis racquet in his hand. He crafted golden victories for the college with that. When it came to tennis, Richy was simply unbeatable. He won many accolades and this won him the so called “college fame”.
Everything in of our lives just fell into place. Our Hang-outs on Richy’s bike, The college excursions, the behind-the-scene proposals( which we used to laugh at), the weekend canteen chats, his tennis practice in late evenings, the college day skit (which was such a flop) ,the terminal exams(no sleep) n so on….
It was beginning of 6th semester when Nandini walked into Richy’s Life. Or rather our lives . Nandini was also a Mechy(female mech. Engg). She was beautiful, smart and alluring. One of those girls who guys would eye even if they decide not to do so. She Joined our Lab group. Not only was she smart at doing things but also she was good at studies. So Richy and I didn’t have problems finishing our records and stuff. We three went out for films. Had long chats in the football ground gallery and it was so much fun. We gave her the biggest surprise on her B’day(though Richy sponsored the gift) ….An electric Guitar that she longed for. Richy himself wrote his special lines on her B’day card. A few days Later I saw them sitting on the edge of football ground…chatting and laughing their stomach out. I didn’t go out to them and spoil their private company. While walking alone to the room, the chord of silver struck me. May be Richy has found his soul-mate. Nandini and him made one heck of a pair. May be they are in Love. No.. that cant be the case… he wont hide it from me…My doubts strengthened when I happened to see his copy a few days later . It was all scribbled “Nandini” in various calligraphy. I felt happy for them. More for Richy because finally he now knows the meaning of Love. He has fallen in Love. God … I couldn’t Believe it. I felt a little envious also since Nandini was not that sort of girl that any guy would appreciate being taken away by another one of his own sex. I too had a crush on her like any other guy . But Now She is my Richy’s Girl. I felt happy for them.
Time went by… and it was our last Christmas week in our college Life. Everyone were in an exhilarating mood. I still remember …. It was on that dark December 21st I received a call from Prof. Varghese saying that Richy has met with a terrible accident and is dying on the hospital bed. I rushed to the hospital. My blood already was red Ice….!! The doctor said he wanted to see me. I went in…. There lies my Richy..all wrapped up in white cloth… Breathing hard through the Life Supporting Mechanism. It was so pathetic to see. It was like seeing your soul about to leave this world. He took my hand in his. His eyelids barely open. What amazed me was he was still trying to smile and he slowly stuck up some thing in my hand…a ragged piece of paper. With that …lies my Richy, Dead. His smile still there on his face. His Bluish Green Eyes …. Wet …. But motionless…!!!
The paper he gave was the last ever words he spoke… The Solemn secret of his that I have Held for the past ten years…. Which gifted me one Life Time of agony….The most paining words u ll ever get from a friend…
Dear Sam Brother,
Pardon me if I am being wrong in doing this. But I have no options. I will not be there to smile back at u when u r reading this stuff……..U know bro… Life is a bloody riddle. I had been cheated once when your so called God took my Mom and Dad away. But he gave you to me.. I rejoiced. He gave me one beautiful set of friends … Like David, Eshant , Gayathri and…. And finally Nandini. She is too Good Man. Such a sweet Kid.
I don’t know what made me close to her. But One thing I know dear….. She was starting to make sense to my Life….But I m such a monster to take her feelings for granted…..I thought she was mine ….until yesterday evening. That’s when she said …….
She is in Love with You Buddy…..!! Trust Me She Loves You….. And Look where am I again. Again a bloody rotten story from Your God ….. I am out of Picture…. Again fooled….Again he is trying a prankster on me…..This time I wont fail… You don’t want your Richy to fail…. Do you? So here I go in search of my Wildest dreams ……trekking on the Rodingarph’s cliff. I will return …..Richy will rewrite History.
You and Nandini form an awesome pair buddy. Marry her. I ll attend your wedding sometime soon. If we have a rebirth … as u fools believe, I always want you to share my Mothers Womb With Me Brother… Because I love You more than anything in this world…..One more thing Dude….. Please don’t take me away from this place …. Where I met u guys…. Let me rest in this soil…. Dreaming U guys will return……to see me …..Promise me two things….
1.I wont leave our campus
2.Nandini Will never Come to know this. Let this trekking thing remain an accident to rest of the world.
So … Its time … to take the passion to my soul…..Live Life Kingsize Brother.
Love,
Your Dirty Brother
Richy The Champ.
As the train of thoughts lay dead, I found myself standing beside Richy’s tomb holding a torn piece of paper. The letter Richy wrote to me. He lay at the far end of our campus. Nandini sits in her wheel chair beside me staring at the words on his tomb. I wanted to speak to him.
Dearest Richy
Had we known that You were this light at heart(not the one you seemed to the world), we would have never dared to play that prankster with you dear. It was I who asked Nandini to say like that to U so that you …. U would open your heart to her that time at least. She loved u Buddy….. not me. She wanted it to hear from u my brother. But look what u did….. Your Nandini has never spoken a word after you left……she always looks to eternity expecting your return……all these years.
Wont you forgive me brother? Wont you come back to us…….!!!
I promise you brother I ll take her to any part of the world. Get the Best of treatment possible…. I ll bring your Nandini back to life.
I know U Richy, within a man lies his real self....which is known to only him....which is so bizarre.... sometimes.....Even the mirror can lie to You. We saw you..... Ur real self.......But u never saw us.....!!!!
Please say … Something … Forgive us dear…..!!!
As the cold winds brushed past me on that December evening, I walked back .. taking Nandini along with me…. To get the promise I made to my Richy. After all that’s the Best I can do for him.
Richy lies there watching us go …..with letters on his tomb echoing ……
"HERE LIES A SOLDIER OF FORTUNE
WHO LIVED FOR HIS FRIENDS….
AND WHO DIED FOR THE SAME……”
Author: Jean J Kachappilly
Infosys Technologies Limited, Bangalore
